Girl Talk

Texting back and forth with a new person is fun! I haven’t done this in a while, because Morena has been my life for the past nine years. I find Zeus enticing, but I have a conscience. I know better than to be messing around with someone else while I’m still married. I made vows to Morena, and I am doing what I can to honor them. Right now, though, Morena isn’t doing much to fix things besides sending me Bible scriptures every morning. Uhm, thanks babe. I think.

I’m back at work, which means MaMogale is gone and I have the house all to myself. Of course, I invite the girls Thembi and Lesedi to the house for a dinner party. They’re dressed to the nines with their freakum dresses on and their hair and makeup are peaking. I’ve cooked lamb curry, basmati rice and a few veggie-based salads. As soon as they pop open the wine bottle, they spill tea on parts of their lives I’ve missed out on while I was away. Thembi goes first.

“Yhu, mgani! I met a man on the flight back to Dubai last week. His name is Bongani. He is so delicious! The unfortunate thing about this story is that he is married, has been for about three months. He kept flirting with me on the plane, giving me all sorts of compliments and telling me he wants to see me again when we are settled back home. I declined, because I’m not about to be anyone’s makhwapheni (isiZulu slang for “mistress”). No ways! Other than that, it’s been work, work, work for me. This modelling thing is more hard work than anyone anticipates it will be until they get into it.”

“Well, as for me, I have managed to secure my place in Emmanuel’s life, finally!”, Lesedi said.

“I have been his ‘almost girlfriend’ for months now, dating casually with others. Now that I am officially his boo, you gorgeous honeys won’t be seeing me very often. I will be spending a lot of my time with my bae, like a good girlfriend should. Work is great, I’ve got new cases I have to attend to, but court dates are nicely spaced out, so I don’t have a lot of pressure.”

I had to give myself a bit of liquid courage to get what was on my mind out of my mouth. I fear my friends judging me for the situation with Zeus, but I will only know this for sure after I have said something. I say a little prayer internally, stare at the ceiling and finally say,

“Morena had an affair with PA. It had been going on for about a year, and I caught them in the shower a few months ago upon my return from the grocery store with MaMogale. I--”

“Wait, WHAT? He did what?”, Lesedi interjected. “Did you kick him out? Did you beat her up? You know I’ll be more than willing to represent you in court, friend. He shouldn’t think he has the upper hand here, because infidelity isn’t let off that easy when we negotiate divorce settlements. Oh my gosh Chom! Are you okay?”

“I’m doing great, actually. I told him to take time out to think about things, and I got time to myself, to heal from that and the miscarriage. Losing Kgosi took a lot from me, so finding out the love of my life stepped out on me took even more from me. I made sure I journal every day, pray to God for healing and keep away from negative situations. I’m in a good place now, I even cut my hair after all these years. Also, I made a new friend…”

The girls were obviously surprised and heated after seeing his Instagram timeline after I told them about him. He and I have been talking often since he sent the first text. I have been ignoring him for the past week though, because I need to focus on my marriage (which Zeus still doesn’t know about). I have never been a fan of therapy, but I guess if it’s what we need to try fix things, then I’ll gladly cooperate.

The first day of couple’s therapy dawns, and I need to moment to breathe before stepping into the office. As soon as I walk in, I notice the bouquet of flowers that Morena has on his lap. He hasn’t given me flowers since our first month of marriage. I greet him, and Dr. Robinson, and take my seat (completely ignoring the flowers morena has for me). As the session begins, I notice the efforts Morena makes to hold my hand as the doctor is asking questions about us. He asked what the sex was like, I laughed out loud spontaneously, like it was a reflex action. I didn’t mean to do that.

“Uhm, well Doc… Our sex life hasn’t been the greatest since we lost our son, Kgosi. It’s been difficult being intimate because the pain of losing him still feels raw. I guess--” Morena responds.

“Actually, Dr. Robinson, the truth is that Morena’s sex life has been brilliant. He has been sleeping with his PA for a while and has even told her that he loves her. Instead of focusing on healing with me, he has managed to heal on his own through intimacy with someone else. I don’t know how relevant that is to your question, but that’s the truth. I cannot remember the last time Morena tried to touch me suggestively, so I guess I’m no longer attractive to him. That makes me angry and hurt.”

After that, Dr. Robinson gave us an exercise: we were to write letters to each other every day expressing how the affair made us feel. I figured that would be easy because writing is something I’m better at than talking. A call from Zeus comes in as we leave the building.

“Hey Beautiful. Care to join me for an evening of art, wine and empty but fulfilling conversation?”, Zeus asked.

“Yeah. Why not? Send a driver to my place around 7pm, I’ll text you the address in a bit. See you then.”